In This Episode

00:00:01 Introduction to Eric Gee and his background

00:05:15 The misconceptions about traditional education

00:09:13 Understanding personality types and their impact

00:16:04 Balancing structure and flexibility in education

00:23:18 The role of creativity in personal growth

00:27:06 The importance of self-understanding in relationships

00:34:37 Key takeaways from “The Power of Personality”

00:41:23 Advice for embracing your authentic self

[00:00:02 – 00:01:11]
Welcome back to the Enlightened Life podcast. I’m so excited you’re here with us. My guest today says he was a bad student. In his words, he could be a teacher’s best friend or worst enemy, swinging between charismatic participant and equally charismatic disc dissident. And so it’s not surprising that for the past two decades, he’s devoted his life to helping others forge a path to success that fits them. He founded an education company centered around individualized growth. He’s coached teachers and business professionals and authored the incredible book the Power of Personality. His mission, to help people understand that our relationships with others are only as healthy as our relationships with ourselves. So sit back and relax and get ready for a conversation that just might change the way you see yourself and the world around you. Please welcome to the show Eric G. Hey, Eric, how are you?

[00:01:11 – 00:01:14]
Thank you for having me. Yeah, I’m excited to be here.

[00:01:15 – 00:01:28]
It’s a pleasure. It’s a pleasure. So tell me, I mean, you’ve done so well for yourself, but you say you were a bad student. How did that early experience shape the way you approach education and success today?

[00:01:28 – 00:02:24]
Yeah, you know, I think when we go to school and it’s a good thing, I think we’re like, trained, like, this is important. This is like the most important thing in your life, and you can’t mess it up and, you know, you have that mindset. But then, at least for me, like, going through the different grade levels, I started realizing, you know, like, this is. Doesn’t feel right sometimes to me, like, I’m not particularly fond of doing my homework all the time. And even though that sounds. I mean, you say that to anybody and they’re like, oh, my gosh, you can’t say that to kids. And it’s like, well, you know, like everybody, like, teachers don’t like doing the classwork. They don’t like correcting their classwork. So that’s something you realize afterwards right after the fact. But as a student, as like a 6, 7, 8 year old, 9 year old kid, you know, it takes a while to kind of break through that mold. And I think that really helped me to understand, like, yeah, there’s different ways that we can all grow. And school in and of itself is a construct. Right. So there’s different schooling that we can get and actually give to kids based on, you know, the different. Their different needs.

[00:02:24 – 00:02:28]
Well, and who really does like homework. I mean, let’s be Honest, I didn’t like it.

[00:02:28 – 00:02:29]
Right.

[00:02:29 – 00:02:51]
You know, I have a son, he’s in sixth grade, and he hates homework. And it’s not about not understanding it. It’s just, I worked all day. Do I really have to do this now? And he can zip through it. And I’m not going to lie. I mean, you know, I work all day, and I don’t necessarily want to do it all night either. So there you go. What do you think is the biggest. Yeah, go ahead. Were you going to say something? I was going to. I didn’t want to interrupt you.

[00:02:51 – 00:03:14]
Oh, no, I was going to say my favorite. One of my favorite quotes of all time is from Nietzsche, and he says, true maturity consists in regaining the seriousness one had as a child at play. And I think that’s so true. Like, we think school is so serious, but it’s like, you know, what we find as adults is the things that really. We had a passion for as children, and they’re really enjoyable to us now are probably the things that are to be the most likely to lead to our success.

[00:03:14 – 00:03:40]
So, yeah, it’s true. And, you know, it will have already come out by then, but there is a. There is an episode that’s actually coming out next week, which will be out long before this episode comes out. But. But it’s really about how you measure success, and it’s not always in the money or the job or how busy you are. It’s. It’s. There’s so many different ways to measure success. I think that’s great. Yeah.

[00:03:40 – 00:03:50]
We all end up in the same place anyway. Right. Like when they say that eventually, after the game of chess is over, the king and the pawn go back into the same box. And so, you know, it’s just really how we play the game, you know?

[00:03:50 – 00:03:58]
Absolutely. So what do you think is the biggest misconception that people have with education? With traditional schooling?

[00:03:58 – 00:05:04]
With traditional schooling, I would probably say that with kids, it’s the assumption that this is. Education has always been there. It’s always been this way. And whatever they’re told from their teachers is absolute. And I think that’s probably the biggest misconception. And then, you know, in reverse, like, I think parents automatically are like, oh, well, I put my kid in this. This is like a surefire way for them to get where they need to go, and they all have to follow the rules. Otherwise, I’m failing as a parent. And I feel like that is all one big assumption. You know, public school wasn’t around, like, 150 years ago. And it was really just a way to give people in control. Right. They didn’t want, and this is going to sound terrible, they didn’t want the masses to be like the uneducated masses that might overthrow the elite. And so the elite were like, well, how are we going to, like, control this? Oh, let’s like, give them something to do. We’re not going to allow them into our private schools. We’re just going to have these public schools that they can kind of do stuff and not like, misbehave. But of course, the coolest thing is, like, the power of the human spirit and the power of human intellect. You know, doesn’t matter what kind of education you get, public or private or however, you know, restricted it was back in the day, people overcome.

[00:05:05 – 00:05:14]
So tell us a little bit about what you do, because I know your business is. It sort of centers around that a little bit. What is it that your business actually does?

[00:05:14 – 00:06:15]
Yeah, you know, I wrote a space on the book. Right. I wrote as. Developed my own personality typing methodology. So I help. Okay, long story short, I actually started first as a writing coach. And what I found as a writing, because that was my background, I studied screenwriting. I wrote my entire life. And what I found out was, you know, in terms of writing, it’s not about grammar, it’s not about sentence structure. It’s not about any of that. It’s about finding your voice. Right? Like helping people find their voice. And what I realized is you can’t help people find their voice if you. They don’t know who they are. And I had always studied personality theory I’d used in my education company. So I just started blending the two together. And it just came to a point where I helped people figure out what personality type they are. Because based on your personality type, your growth arc is going to be determined by that. So that’s pretty much what my company does, is I help people find out who they are so that they can know where they’re going or at least the best version or the road at which they’re going to become the best version of themselves.

[00:06:15 – 00:06:19]
And what age are we looking at? What do you start working with people?

[00:06:19 – 00:06:59]
I start as early as like 9 or 10. You know, I’ve worked with students that are really young, but my preference is usually 9 or 10. And generally that’s when I get them, specifically 10 or 11, actually, I should say, because I think. And any parent would know that’s like the. The moment where their kids starts hating them and they stop listening to Them and they’re just like, why? What happened to this cute little kid that used to like, just want to get ice cream and stuff? So that is the, that’s the age that I start coming in and like, okay, I’m like the honest person who’s going to joke around but also get them to ideally find who they are and you know, because kids will talk about things that they might with me that they might not talk with their parents about right, at that age, you know, adolescence. But yeah, that’s the perfect time.

[00:07:00 – 00:07:09]
And so what do you do with that information once you have that? You know, how do they use the information? I guess I should say, you know.

[00:07:09 – 00:08:31]
I had a student just the other day ask me. So I’m a dolphin. So my personality typing methodology uses animal types, right? It’s very easy to remember. There’s 16 of them and, and you can find out about all about that in the book. But I had a student say she knows she’s a dolphin now because I told her that after meeting her there, talking with her and I’ve been working with her for maybe a couple of years now. And you know, she’s around 12 now and she’s just, she originally wanted to be a vet, but I realized that, you know, very early, I was like, okay, I think someone, maybe your grandparents, maybe your parents told you, okay, like you should be a vet because you like dogs, you know, you like dogs. Doctor, what’s the doctor? Animals. A vet, you know, And I’m like, okay, maybe that’s not exactly what you want to do. And so she started asking me just the other day, like, what do dolphins, you know, what should a dolphin want to do? I’m like, well, you can’t really just go for a specific job, but think of the specific skills that you can work on as a 12 year old. And then if you can just pursue those things, there’s gonna, they’re gonna lead to certain jobs. And I think for dolphins specifically, I was like, well, dolphins love working with people, they love leading people, but in a very safe space. So obviously that might lead towards counseling, education, maybe working, owning your own non profit things of that nature. So yeah, your personality type can very lead to like different careers and different paths of life, I would say.

[00:08:31 – 00:08:42]
Do you have any suggestions for people who feel like they’re stuck in a system that doesn’t fit who they are? What should they do? Like, you know, you realize you’re there. What do I do now?

[00:08:42 – 00:09:37]
Ooh, that’s a good question. And I, you know, I Have a couple clients who get. Who are in that spot. And I always, I’m also a pragmatist. I’m always like, well, don’t just leave. I know you’re. Unless you really have to. Unless you feel like you’re going to get so depressed that you can’t handle anymore. But generally it’s more like people are feeling that slow burn right, where they’re like, oh, I’m not feeling that great. Not terrible. But I’m feeling like a three or four in my job. Not a one but a three or four. I’m like, okay, that’s when you need to start planning for the future and just start thinking of a way out. I would definitely recommend finding what your. What your personality type is, because I think I’ve had a lot of clients who, you know, they’re in their 40s, the mid-40s, mid-50s, and they’re just like, wow, I’ve never really had to think about this, and I probably should have, but now, you know, there’s. It’s never too late to start find out what you are, because you find out your personality type, you can actually find out probably what you truly want out of life. And then that’ll help you decide what’s the next path. Right. Like where you go from. Yeah, exactly.

[00:09:37 – 00:10:10]
Do you find that it’s easier to grab them as children? I. When I say easier, I mean, you know, you get someone who’s 50, let’s use as an example, who’s sort of set in their ways. They have their family, they have their life experience. It’s difficult to just leave a job that pays well when you have all these other responsibilities to, you know, to pursue something that may or may not give you immediate gratification. But when you’re catching them at, you know, 10 years old, it’s almost like you have all this time to sort of figure it out. Even if you don’t really get the right answer at 10, maybe you’ll get it by 20.

[00:10:11 – 00:11:21]
Yeah, no, I 100% agree. It’s so much better working with, you know, at a young age, even though, once again, it’s never too late. But, you know, what’s the Yoda statement? You have to unlearn what you’ve learned. And I think when we’re adults, and that goes for me as well, we have all these assumptions in our mind that have been built up over these years of experience. Right. And that can be hard to break. So, of course, with kids, you know, it’s a little bit easier to do that, you know, even like I have like a 15 year old student and even then there are a lot of assumptions that I have to break because they’ve been built up and not just be. It’s not anyone’s fault. It’s just like the whole system, right? You go to school and all your classmates want to do this thing and they’re saying how important this is. So of course you think this is like the most important thing in the world. But at the end of the day, like you said, like, even if you don’t, like, even if they don’t change or grow at 10, 11 or 12, by the time they’re 19 or 20, you know, they’re going to get it, you know, or ideally get it. One of my favorite quotes from Twain is when he says, you know, my dad when I was 12, like I had no use for the old man, but by the time I was turned 18, it was amazing how much he had learned in the last six years, you know, and obviously it’s not, it’s not the dad who’s learning.

[00:11:21 – 00:11:50]
Yeah. And you know, it is funny, you see that with kids. You see this, you know, cuddly, affectionate, we want to be just like dad, you know, and then they go through this whole period and they kind of come back around. Hopefully they come around and understand all that they learned and have gained from their experience, which I think is fantastic. You personality typed over 50,000 people, which is a lot of people. Have you noticed any patterns that maybe surprised you about the human personality?

[00:11:50 – 00:13:18]
Yeah, I mean, my book is essentially the whole pattern drawn out in terms of how do you figure out what these different personality types are? And I think a lot of people don’t love the idea of like categorizing, but my feeling is like, we all categorize, right? Like we’re always like, oh yeah, that person’s a type A or that person’s quiet and that person’s introverted. And I’m just like, well, you know, like everybody typecast, everybody does all those kinds of things. But I think the, my whole philosophy is maybe we can make that a little deeper, a little bit more complex and also a little more open to change. Right. Like, because I think my whole point is like what I found, like, you know, typing 50,000 people is our idea of people changes. Right. And it’s not like they themselves haven’t changed. We’ve probably just learned or I have just learned more about them, which is great. And so my idea for the book is just to encourage people to be on that constant lifetime goal of just learning more about the people in their lives, especially the ones closest to us. Right. And I think the more information we get, the more things change where we’re not assuming, oh, my kid’s going to be exactly like me because I’m me. You know, I think that’s the one thing I really got a lot working with. You know, a lot of those 50,000 people were parents and students. Right. And you know, my company worked on maybe a thousand students a year. So that makes, you know, a thousand pairs of parents a year and we get to see the interaction. And a lot of those parents of course were like assuming that their kid was going to be exactly like them, which, you know, obviously you have a son, you know, it’s probably not always like that. Percentages are, it’s not going to be that way. So we just got to like understand it.

[00:13:18 – 00:13:50]
They are their own people. And you know, you realize that from a very young age. My son is more outgoing, he’s more athletic, he’s more, you know, he’s certainly a lot more social than I ever was at that age. In fact, he kind of drags me along with him, which, you know, I don’t love sitting at the birthday parties with the, you know, 20 something year old moms. You know, that’s just kind of how it is. But don’t expect it. Don’t expect that they’ll be like you. I’m not like my parents and I’m sure he won’t be like me. But raising to be good people, that’s all that matters, you know.

[00:13:50 – 00:14:00]
Right. We all have parents. Yeah. Right. So yeah, yeah. So you know, we know, we know that we’re not like most people are like, I’m nothing like my parents. It’s like, well, yeah, if you’re nothing like your parents, then why would you expect your kids to be like you?

[00:14:00 – 00:14:26]
That seems, yeah, it doesn’t, it’s not realistic. I mean it happens. But I would count on it, you know, I would think too that understanding personality type, you know, yes, it does help your career and your life path, but sometimes going to also be helpful with relationships and, and a sense of purpose for yourself, you know, just in here and understanding who you are and, and how you relate to people and what you want out of life.

[00:14:26 – 00:15:07]
Right. I think Gardner in his like seven intelligences. Well, I guess it’s eight now but like those are the two ones, interpersonal and interpersonal that are like inter is like, yeah. Understanding people around us. Intra is understanding ourselves and that’s pretty much what personality typing helps us do, is like, it’s understanding, okay? Like, you know, my mom or my dad is like this, and this is what they want and these are their values, but this is my value. And obviously we have conflicting values. Then clearly there’s going to be conflict, right? And it’s really just knowing that we can’t change that. You can’t change what someone values, and if you do that, then you’re really trying to change them. And that’s never going to be healthy, right? So, like, unless you’re planning on giving them shock therapy, it’s not. It’s probably not going to take. And that’s also not good.

[00:15:07 – 00:15:10]
So, no, I wouldn’t want that either. Yeah.

[00:15:11 – 00:15:19]
So, yeah, it’s all about inter and interpersonal intelligence. Understanding different personality types helps us just get along better with people and understand that you can’t change them.

[00:15:20 – 00:15:31]
Can you share? I mean, obviously, you know, you wouldn’t do it anyway, but anonymity and no names or anything. But can you. Can you share what’s one of the most powerful transformations you’ve witnessed?

[00:15:31 – 00:17:27]
You know, let me do a generalization. Not because, yes, I’m trying to hide names or anything, but actually this is probably my. I wouldn’t say my ideal student, but the student I’m probably best with. So, you know, as everyone else, you know, we have our limitations. There are some students that I’m probably not the best with. And, you know, the nice thing about owning the education company for a decade is I had a lot of teachers. So we really placed teachers with specific kids that we found that they would work best with. And I’ll do that for myself. I’m not gonna be great with everyone. So my ideal student would probably be. So I’m gonna be saying an animal type. And that’s gonna be like people like, what is that? But if you look at the book or you go on my website, the panda personality type, and specifically, or I’m sorry, the grouping is called shaman types. And within that pack of types, there are four personalities. And the panda is one of them. And that’s probably my ideal student. And that what that is. It’s someone who wants to find themselves but has always felt like they don’t belong, but they want to try to assimilate. And that can be a really dangerous thing, right. When you’re in a situation where you feel less of yourself because everyone around you is telling you things, things that you are not right and. But you want to be. And I think I’ve seen that transformation quite a bit. Where I’ve had students from age 10 all the way through, in their mid-20s, and they, and they see, still keep in touch with me now in their early 30s, where they’re just like, hey, like, I just want to let you know, like, all the things you taught me, and that really meant something to me. And that’s the best feeling because really what I was just teaching them is like, there’s nothing wrong with you. You’re totally cool, you’re totally fine being the way you are, and just like, go for it. But specifically, the panda type needs that constant reminder because they’re constantly feeling like, these pangs of self doubt. And I think for me, my personality type is one that can understand them but is a little bit more aggressive. And I’m just more like, no, no, do go for it, go for it, go for it. I think I work best with them, and I’ve been able to see that type really transform and gain confidence throughout their life.

[00:17:28 – 00:17:54]
Well, you know, it’s funny though, that you say that, because I can see it even in. In me as a person that, you know, I’ll be around people who I think, gee, you know, maybe I should think that way or maybe I should feel that way or do things that way instead of the way that I’m doing them, that sometimes it’s hard. I can imagine, you know, being a child and feeling like that you really have the peer pressure, whether it’s intentional or not, to change who you are and how you think.

[00:17:54 – 00:18:21]
Yeah. One of my students, she asked me the other day, she said, or she didn’t ask me. She told me, you know, I don’t want to grow up. And I was like, I know exactly how you feel, and I know exactly what you mean by that. And I just told her, like, you know, we all have to grow up, but you don’t have to grow up in the way you probably think or you have been told that you need to grow up. It’s a totally different mentality. And she’s a shaman type as well. So I totally understand. And by the way, I’m going to guess, Scott, that you also are a shaman type. I’m going to guess a humpback whale would be my guess.

[00:18:21 – 00:18:24]
What is that? Tell me about that.

[00:18:24 – 00:18:36]
Humpback whales are soul searchers. I always say, like, if you have the. The stereo, theoretical or hypothetical village of our community or society is a village, the humpback whale is like the soul of the village.

[00:18:36 – 00:18:37]
Oh, okay.

[00:18:37 – 00:19:16]
Yeah. So they really take things on themselves. Kind of like where you said, like, they are a shaman type and shamans in general are going to want to, like, they’re always going to feel some self doubt because they’re always going to feel like, am I doing the right thing? Like, because these other people want this. And that doesn’t seem like I want to do right. And I’m like, and. But like you said, as comparing yourself to your son, humpback whales are a lot more reserved, they’re a lot more inward. Like the archetype is like Luke Skywalker, Harry Potter, that, you know, Campbellian, Joseph Campbell hero type where like they bring to themselves and they tend to be very spiritual. I don’t know if you like nature, but oftentimes humpback whales also like commune with nature because that’s the way that they find themselves.

[00:19:17 – 00:19:43]
I am very much one with anything that allows me to reflect inward with, you know, nature. You know, I’m loud music, I’m into, you know, more refined, but just sitting out and being alone and with myself, whether it’s on the deck or out, you know, for a walk or something in the, in the, you know, in the nature, you know, that, that, that’s where I’m most at peace.

[00:19:44 – 00:20:12]
Yeah. Humpback whales are often like students. They’re the daydreamers. So they’re the ones who, like, if you’re in class and you just kind of, they start zoning out. I’ve had a student zone out when they’re in front of me is one on one and. Yeah, like, are you like daydreaming right now? Aren’t you? And they’re like, oh, sorry. It’s just like, you know, and it’s not a bad thing. Like, it’s just because one thing sets them off. And I don’t know if you’ve ever had that experience where you just hear something or hear a music or something sets you off and you just kind of like Almost meditate for 10 minutes off to the side where people are like, where’d you go?

[00:20:12 – 00:20:22]
True. It’s true. Now you don’t teach them. I mean, they don’t come to you for their schooling. Right. They still go to school. School. Their regular school. Right, right.

[00:20:22 – 00:20:22]
Yeah.

[00:20:23 – 00:20:32]
So how do you balance the need for structure with the need for flexibility? You know, when they go back into the classroom.

[00:20:32 – 00:21:38]
That’s a great question. Because that’s always, that’s always super difficult. Right. Because I don’t want them to. Like, I’m not the type of person, like, everything you’re doing there is terrible, because it’s not. I’m super honest, though. I always tell them, hey, I have. You’re going to have great teachers and you’re going to have bad teachers. I also had that. And I think it’s important to be honest because when I’m honest with them, that means that when they get like a homework assignment, because sometimes they’ll bring. Ask for help or they’ll mention things, and if they get a homework assignment that I really think is helpful, I’ll say it. And it’s almost like, well, I think even if they don’t like doing the homework assignment, they have to believe that it’s important to them because I said it. And I wouldn’t lie because I’ve also said, oh, yeah, that’s kind of just tedious work. So, you know, you don’t. You can put minimum effort into that, but I would put maximum effort into that. And sometimes I’ll help them with their schoolwork and try to integrate that. Because often, depending on the personality type, some personality types really, really do want to do their schoolwork and are just like, no, I’m. This is. This is what’s important. I need to focus on this. I don’t want to work on any of this holistic stuff. And those are the times where I want to, like, kind of like, get them from this and slowly move them towards the holistic stuff. I don’t think you can kind of. They’re. They. They’re in a bubble, and you can’t pop the bubble. Right. You got to expand it.

[00:21:38 – 00:21:38]
Right.

[00:21:38 – 00:21:39]
Slowly.

[00:21:39 – 00:21:39]
Right.

[00:21:39 – 00:21:39]
So.

[00:21:39 – 00:22:00]
But they still have to do the work. Right? So it’s part of the school, and they have to fit in with the structure and they have to follow the rules, and they can’t just get up and walk around and just daydream because that’s where they’re. Because they’re a humpback whale. The teacher’s going to look at them like, sit your hump down. Oh, yeah, do what you need to do. So it’s like trying to assimilate into that but understanding who you are.

[00:22:00 – 00:23:03]
Oh, right. Yes. Yeah. You know, the funny thing is I had a friend who was talking to me about his son, and, you know, he asked me some advice for advice because, you know, I. That’s obviously what I do. And basically his son is in sixth grade, so I’m. That’s like 11 or 12. And he’s like, yeah, he just stopped doing his work completely. Just stop. He’s like, just completely for the last month, he has not done any work. And his son’s really smart. His son’s really, really smart. And it’s just if he’s bored and he doesn’t think it’s important and it’s beneath him is how he feels. And I told him, well, you just got to tell you, your son looks at the world this way, but in that way, he’s also pragmatic. So, you know, he’s not going to sacrifice himself on principle. So that’s what you got to do. Just tell him, hey, like, you know something my dad told me, he’s like, hey, you know what? I agree with you completely. Your teacher is not as smart as you. Totally understand that. That’s totally reasonable. But they’re the person who’s in charge of your grade. They’re the ones who have control over you and the power over you. So until you get that leverage, then you just got to do. Just make do with what you got. Just be pragmatic about it. And I think some people just think that way.

[00:23:03 – 00:23:10]
Yeah, it’s good advice. So what’s the biggest mistake, you know, leaders make when managing a diverse team of personalities?

[00:23:11 – 00:23:19]
Oh, I think it’s definitely thinking that the way their ideal, especially their ideal leader, is their style.

[00:23:19 – 00:23:19]
Right.

[00:23:19 – 00:23:24]
Because I do think. And it doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t lead that way. You got to lead with. You got to lead with your style.

[00:23:24 – 00:23:24]
Right.

[00:23:24 – 00:23:40]
That’s the way you are. That’s okay. You got to be yourself, especially in your leadership position. But also understand that not everybody is going to respond to that. And you might have to adjust your style in a way that works best with everyone if you want the whole unit to work properly.

[00:23:41 – 00:24:00]
I almost feel like what you do could be really wonderful on a larger level, say within a school district where the teachers get together and learn what you have to teach them so that they can better understand who they have in their classroom.

[00:24:00 – 00:24:22]
Yeah. You know, it’s funny, with my teachers, when I had my education company, the ones that took to it the quickest were the ones who actually had children. And a lot of teachers have children, so it’s great because they were just like, oh, now I’m getting it. Because they’re just like, no wonder why I always say, no wonder why I love all my kids equally, but this kid I really dislike sometimes. They really piss me off sometimes. And this is my favorite, right?

[00:24:22 – 00:24:23]
Yeah. Yeah.

[00:24:23 – 00:24:46]
And they start realizing, oh, it’s just because our personalities are similar, so we’re on the same wavelength. We’re communicating the same. And then this person, I’m just fight my son or daughter. I’m just fighting them the whole way, tooth and nail, which is cool that you understand. You know, you’re like, oh, my son’s totally different than me. And that’s totally cool. Just the way you described him. Sounds a lot like a fox type, but that’s just a total me thin, thin slice there, but sounds a little bit like a fox.

[00:24:46 – 00:25:15]
Yeah. And he’s a good kid, he’s smart, he’s just insanely outgoing and, you know, and I, he’s got, you know, just for example, a few weeks ago he had a party. It was a basketball end of season party. And he’s excited all week. And I’m thinking, man, I hope it’s rained out so I don’t have to go. You know, it’s that kind of, you know, the weekend comes around, I just want to be left alone, you know. But it, it’s just, you know, it’s just the way it is. It’s just how it is. We all manage.

[00:25:15 – 00:25:23]
Oh, yeah. Well, foxes are natural networkers, so that’s their strength. I mean. Yeah, you know, I got an uncle who’s a fox and he’s like, connects this person, this person that.

[00:25:23 – 00:25:45]
That’s, it’s unbelievable. Yeah. I actually admire it in them, to be perfectly honest with you. It’s just not who I am. Yeah. So I want to switch gears just a second because, you know, you’ve worn a lot of hats. You’re a pianist, barbecue enthusiast, fantasy football champion, mentor. How do you stay connected to all these different sides of yourself?

[00:25:45 – 00:26:59]
You know, because of my personality type that, that one’s actually easy. And it’s not necessarily a great thing. It’s not necessarily a great thing because my, the weakness of my. I’m a baboon type. And baboons, we love, we get super enthusiastic about stuff. We’re shamans as well. And so our main goal as shamans, and that goes for humpback whales, baboons, pandas and dolphins, is to discover ourselves. Right. Like, find out more about us. Right. So baboons were the most, like, aggressive in terms of like, oh, I’m gonna try this, I’m gonna try this, I’m gonna try this. And you know, in terms of finding ourselves, however, we don’t always finish what we start. And so we can get really enthusiastic about something and not complete whatever the project is. And we have like 20 different projects going on at one time. So I do know, knowing that has helped me because I need to be conscious of that and I have to be like, okay, I need to finish some of the things that I start. Knowing that that is a weakness of mine. But the actual starting is not a problem. But they’re finishing was somewhat of a problem. But I, I got through it, you know, I, I’m a pianist. I, I, I started really young, but I probably did not practice as much as I probably should have. So I always say, yeah, I played for 15 years, but you know, I don’t know, I probably practice like a 20% of what I should have. So I probably would have been a lot better if I had actually been more committed.

[00:26:59 – 00:27:01]
It’s always the way. It’s always the way, you know.

[00:27:01 – 00:27:02]
Yeah.

[00:27:02 – 00:27:08]
So do you feel that your creativity played any role in your journey or personal and professional growth?

[00:27:09 – 00:28:16]
Yeah, you know, like obviously writing the book, you know, once it’s a non fiction book but you know, I wrote it in a way that it’s try to, it tries to be fun and engaging and once again I, I was a screenwriting major so I kind of took that kind of like because I don’t understand why things have to be, you know, school teaches us that or tells us or tries to train us that only boring things are important. I think that’s what kids get now. I don’t think that’s what teachers are explicitly saying and trying to do, but I do think that’s what we interpret. Only boring, serious things are going to be important in our life and the fun things are great, but you know, they won’t be important, you know, and I totally don’t understand that. So in terms of the creative aspect, for sure, like I’ve always tried to, like even the way I try to talk about this particular subject because it can get kind of wonky is in a way that’s ideally somewhat engaging and fun where I’m just like, why take it so seriously? Yeah, you’re like Luke Skywalker or you’re like Harry Potter, you know, like that’s fun. You know, people like to hear that and they can connect with it and they can read the person who’s like Harry Potter or Luke Skywalker Walker. It’s probably watched Star wars and has had some kind of connection with that person. So it’s a very easy connect, you know. And I try to make it as fun as possible and I think that is where the creative side comes in.

[00:28:16 – 00:28:30]
That’s great. Can you talk about. Well, you had mentioned that, that our relationship with others is only as healthy as our relationship with ourselves. Can you just maybe just talk about that just a little bit?

[00:28:30 – 00:29:17]
Yeah, yeah. You know, I think in general, we. Especially depending on the personality type you are, you tend to, like, see the outside as a big influence. Right. Like, this is what I should be like. Right. But, yeah, really, it’s about finding yourself, and that’s your relationship with yourself and the stronger relationship you have yourself. I always say, find your anchor first. It’s okay to try different things, but you got to know who you are. Because if you don’t know who you are, then you’re constantly going to be, like, adjusting for every single person around you, and that’s not even fair to them. Right. Other people need to know who you truly are. Right. So I think our relationships with other people are always improved when we have a stronger idea of who we are as a person, because then we can communicate with them better. We’re not feeling insecure. We can go, hey, this is me, and you know, this is me. But I also appreciate what you are.

[00:29:18 – 00:29:31]
Yeah. Perfect. In your book the Power Personality, it represents decades of work. If readers could walk away with one lesson from that, what do you hope that would be?

[00:29:33 – 00:29:43]
I would say everything that you’ve learned so far in your life might not necessarily be true and best for you and find out what’s true and best for you.

[00:29:44 – 00:29:45]
Beautiful.

[00:29:45 – 00:29:45]
That’s the one lesson.

[00:29:45 – 00:29:56]
Yeah. On that note, if you could go back and talk to your younger, charismatic, dissident self way back when, what advice would you give yourself?

[00:29:57 – 00:30:12]
I would say that wearing jeans, like, 10 sizes too big and sagging them is a terrible fashion statement. That’s exactly what I’d say. I grew up in the 90s. Yeah. So, yeah, that’s exactly what I’d say.

[00:30:12 – 00:30:22]
Yeah. You know, I think every era, I grew up in the 80s primarily. And they were wearing their sweatshirts inside out, and the hair was about three feet wide. And, you know, it was crazy.

[00:30:22 – 00:30:26]
Did you ever wear, like, a thin tie? Like a really thin tie? Really thin?

[00:30:27 – 00:30:34]
Yes, yes, yes. The thin tie, the parachute pants, the Members Only jacket? Yeah. None of it was good.

[00:30:34 – 00:30:55]
You know, I still have them. I still have a Members Only jacket that I will wear. It’s my father’s. I had one as a child. I had one as a child. We had matching Members Only jackets. And I still have. Obviously, I inherited my dad’s Members Only jackets. I still wear it just because obviously makes me feel closer to him. And I also had one. Obviously not that size, but, yeah, I still wear It.

[00:30:55 – 00:31:16]
I moved about four years ago and threw out two of them. Well, donated them because I was like, I’ll never wear. Well, first of all, I don’t think I could because it probably would only button to about here. You know, those days are long gone. So that. That’s not happening anymore. But yeah, it’s so funny the things we used to have. Oh, yeah, go ahead, Go ahead, Erica.

[00:31:16 – 00:31:24]
Oh, I was just say. I was just gonna say I still have those size 38 jeans that I used to. 38 guess jeans that I used to sag.

[00:31:25 – 00:31:25]
Yeah.

[00:31:26 – 00:31:28]
You know, crazy much weight. Yeah.

[00:31:28 – 00:31:46]
Oh, don’t do that to yourself. Yeah, but you’re right. You’re right. I mean, it’s funny. Everything had to be oversized and baggy. I wanted to try something fun with you. I just have a few little questions. We’ll do like a rapid fire thing just so people can get to learn a little bit about you. Early bird or night owl?

[00:31:46 – 00:31:47]
Night owl.

[00:31:48 – 00:31:51]
Favorite eight? Yeah. Favorite 80s or 90s TV show.

[00:31:52 – 00:31:58]
Ooh, wow, that’s a. That. Oh, God, I love tv. That’s super hard. I’m going to go. This is the first one that popped in my head. Small wonder.

[00:31:59 – 00:32:00]
Small wonder. Okay.

[00:32:00 – 00:32:01]
Wonder Vicky. Vicky the robot.

[00:32:01 – 00:32:06]
Yeah, yeah. There you go. If you could master one new skill instantly, what would it be?

[00:32:06 – 00:32:08]
Juggling. For sure. I. I got that one.

[00:32:08 – 00:32:09]
Really?

[00:32:09 – 00:32:14]
I do not know to juggle it. I’m terrible at it. But I would love. I would trade every skill I have if I could just juggle.

[00:32:14 – 00:32:15]
That’s. That’s awesome.

[00:32:15 – 00:32:16]
Seems so cool.

[00:32:16 – 00:32:20]
Piano or fantasy football? Which one wins? If you had to pick only one.

[00:32:20 – 00:32:29]
Forever, I say I’d say the piano because I think that can give joy to other people as well. Where fantasy football is only giving it to myself if I win.

[00:32:30 – 00:32:31]
If you win. That’s right.

[00:32:31 – 00:32:32]
If I win. Right.

[00:32:32 – 00:32:35]
And lastly, best piece of advice you’ve ever received.

[00:32:35 – 00:33:22]
Oh, I got that one. So my dad, when I was sagging my jeans and wearing those size 38, I was a bit of a poser. And my dad finally. Well, he actually would say this when I was six or seven as well. But he finally just said, you know what? At the end of the day, nobody gives a shit. So you got to do what works for you, you know, because you are not the. I always said you’re not the main character in anyone else’s story. You’re only the main character in your story. You’re just a side character in other people’s. Maybe a cameo in other people’s. Story. So why worry about what they think? You just got to do what feels right for you. And, and that it took a while for that to really sink in. Because of course, when you’re 14 or 15, you’re like, what are you talking about? You know, anything. You know, I’m being cool and, you know, I’m just trying to, like, not feel like garbage. But yeah, what it is.

[00:33:23 – 00:33:30]
Yeah. Good for you. Eric, is there anything you’d like to share with the listeners that we haven’t talked about? This is your time to kind of.

[00:33:30 – 00:33:43]
Oh, just, you know, the only thing is a shameless plug of my book, the Power of Personality. You can get it anywhere on Amazon. If you want to give Jeff Bezos your money or want to just go support your local bookstore, you can order it from there or book bookshop.

[00:33:43 – 00:34:51]
Yeah. Beautiful. Beautiful. And that brings us to the end of today’s episode. I hope you found as much inspiration and wisdom in this conversation as I did. And if you’d like to learn more about Eric and the incredible work he’s doing to help people tap into their true potential, be sure to visit his website at www.projectutopia.com. utopia is Y O U C-O-P I a project utopia.com and there you’ll find more about his programs, his book the Power of Personality, and how you can work with him directly. And if you’re interested in connecting with me, learning more about mediumship, upcoming events, or other inspiring guests we have lined up, you can visit my website at www.mediumscottallen.com. thank you so much for spending time with us today. And remember, the path to your best life starts when you honor who you truly are. Until next time, stay inspired, stay curious, and keep living your best enlightened life. Have a good day, everybody. That’s it. Let me just stop the record.